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Dear Journal,
Oh what liberation! Where do I begin? At the beginning? ...Or his middle to my end? Long story short or an in-depth account? Honestly, I'm so...I don't even know how, where, or what to think anymore. If we start at the interesting parts of the beginning I shall only say, this cross-country trip was originally a surprise for Summer’s twenty-second birthday in blind cupidity to rekindle the high school sweetheart flame-post Voldemort fiasco.
Funny how we shoot for the moon and land on the nearby planet in another cosmos entirely.
When I bought my ticket from LA to NYC, he was the third person I told after Dani, who was putting me up for the week in Harlem, and Summer, which we’ve already skimmed over. Following a day of slutatious texting, Dani accompanied me to meet him and his crew for drinks at Night of Joy on Lorimer in Williamsburg. It was chill, minus a few instances of mental disarray caused by the fact that the last time he was in my presence, we were naked and sweat-stained in the south of France. It took a minute for me to recalibrate and wipe clean the fantasy goggles I chose to view him through.
There were a couple of moments where he was hard to gauge. It had been so long, and I wasn't sure if I was reading the right social cues from him or the group as a whole. Everyone was polite...ish. There was one guy in the gaggle of hipster gays who has made often romantic-style appearances in Facebook photos. I didn’t know enough about XXXX, let alone his friends, to have made a judgement call on this dude’s leading, or supporting, role in the night’s affairs. I kept my eyes and ears on all hands and arms within the group, hoping to deduce if I would get any action when they all dissipated........
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