They flake on you when you make plans to meet up; either they ‘forgot’ or ‘something came up last minute’. But this doesn’t happen once; this happens enough times for you to recognise a very complex pattern that spells out ‘I don’t really care about you, I care about how you make me feel when I need to kill some time but right now, I’ve found something more important to involve myself in so I’ll drop you and pick you up if/when I feel like because I know you’ll be there waiting on me’. People don’t flake on what they believe is necessary. Even if something genuinely comes up, they will give you enough notice but also make an effort to rearrange to meet up and fully follow through with it. Not flake again. If you can relate to being on the receiving end of this, don’t bother responding to that person anymore if your relationship with them can be minimised. You deserve to spend your time with people who value it. Remember: anybody who does not respect your time, does not respect you. If you feel like you’re a flake, quit being a flake. A lot of the time, flakiness comes from heavy anxiety. As someone who has dealt with very serious anxiety, I’ll let you know this: you’re better off keeping your distance and being consistent with that, than flaking here and there and only being known as an inconsistent person. Ever been in a situation where you are friends with someone you consider a close friend but all of a sudden, they suddenly stop congratulating you on your achievements like real friends do? As much as external validation is not something we should be reliant on, it is important to keep in mind that someone who calls their self your friend is someone you should be able to share your joy with; someone who encourages you to go for it; someone who reminds you not to give up; someone who cheers you on. If you are beginning to notice that your friend no longer plays a supportive role in your life, it’s important to understand where this sudden change of energy has come from. It’s a tough one to admit to yourself, but they may simply be jealous of you, especially when you are always coming to them with good news. This can sometimes create jealousy because you are reminding them of what they wish they could achieve.