Looking to work in the music industry for12 years.Having been rejected so much times has affected my mental health.

To gain confidence and passion after been rejected so many times?


  • That sounds incredibly tough, Karina. I hope you can find a way to chase this dream of yours down that is much more satisfying than debilitating. 'Cos if the process hurts so badly, you're not going to feel like putting the effort in to get the results you're looking for.

    So as unwelcome as this is, there are three opportunities I'd like you to consider & one gift that might help:
    – Have you thought about changing your tack? If the way you're applying isn't yet working, is there a different approach you can take? How about going the longer way round by developing relationships with influencers in the industry/looking for mentors/volunteering? What else can you think of that you could try?
    – Try changing the story you're running with around this. Maybe they’re not saying no to you but simply saying yes to someone else?
    If your internal plotlines aren't serving you, rewrite them
    – Nobody likes these feelings. But are you curious about where your strong reaction to rejection stems from? This could be an invaluable opportunity to heal some old wounds so that you're less vulnerable to rejection's sting in the future. A therapist or maybe even a coach can help you make that transition
    – And the gift could be creativity. As unwelcome as it is, rejection has a habit of sparking creativity & more. The skills you pick up practicing adaptation in the heat of some very strong emotions could change your life & make you even more invaluable in your chosen career.

    We feel your pain, Karina. And we see you. So thank you for being vulnerable. But none of us want you to quit – especially when your setbacks could actually be the making of you.

    Do circle back & let us know if any of our feedback changes your story, Karina…
  • I know this seems so easy for me to write but I really believe that whatever you were rejected for wasn’t meant for you - the thing that is will come.

    I also really believe that being active in this space can work wonders for your mental health because even if you haven’t seen the result you want yet, you’ll feel like you’re in control and being productive. So network, actively apply for stuff (by that, I mean contact people directly - if you aren’t already - rather than passively apply to job ads), and get noticed - get active on social media, share opinions, write articles, engage with posts from people in the industry (again, if you aren’t already).

    Hang in there - something will happen one day. Look after yourself while you wait.

  • It can be so disheartening to feel rejected. Especially after two years that has made many of feel like an island, lonely and floating on our own.

    I think it is important – although very difficult – to remember that this isn't personal. Rejection happens for many reasons, many of them broader than the individual on the receiving end and highly contextual. Often, it really isn't personal. but it's hard to not take it that way. Not letting it get you down, erode your confidence or make you think you're not good enough.

    A way of doing this is to focus on the things you can control, and acknowledge what you need to accept so it doesn't eat you up. Then you can trying to focus on learning and growth in the face of a 'no' to try and turn it into 'not right now' (e.g. can I get some feedback? Do you mind if I keep in touch or send you any new stuff I'm working on?)

  • Hey Karina, I imagine that this is incredibly fustrating for you, music is notoriously tricky to break into. You might have already tried this but there are a heap of music licencing companies and sound studios in London (again not sure if you're in London) that you can try and get into. You'd usually have to start as a runner or a receptionist but you'd get lots of contacts and it really is a good foot in the door. Factory Sound, Grand Central, String and Tins, Native Music, Monster Music are a few that I can name off the top of my head. You'd be able to go through them one by one and call them to see if you can get in there. Hopefully that's helpful and might be another option for you to get into the industry. Tamryn
  • When doors close. Punch through walls and create your own openings and path. Don’t wait for permission to create music if it’s your passion.

    Rejection shouldn’t stop you, if it’s what you want to do. But rejection is also redirection - to enable you to try new ways to elevate your sound.

    With the resources of today, create your own sound and position within the music space. Build a loyal following (which takes time) and sustain that to the point they elevate your sound into new spaces, audiences and ears.

    Eventually everyone will knock on your door.
  • Hey What is it you would like to do in the industry I have a few connects I can network you with. I am an artist from South East London IG: @sauc3e (IFB btw) hit me up, hope your in better spirits soon! x
  • Him to H.E.R – you have something... I can hear it.

    What you need to do, before feeling like Chiwetel Ejiofor, is to connect with a creator... someone that sees rejection as a way forward.


    Leona Lewis used to sing into her headset as a receptionist in between taking calls...

    Laurieann Gibson, brought a producer to a small show to see an artist, the producer rejected the artist and the offer... she is now know as... Lady Gaga.

    Kanye West used to rap to people in the office and they failed to consider his talent... because they only saw him as a producer! But he is everything he needs to be now, producer, rapper, creative, fashion designer... and more... much more...

    Rejection... (in my opinion) means that 'sometimes', they found someone who fits... or someone that will not cause ripples, or distrupt business as usual... and look that's not a bad thing...

    but 'you' need someone that will take a chance...
    That will, except, push, pull, allow, develop, trust, promote and understand what your message within your music is...

    I would say... Dame

    Contact Dame Dash... tell him I suggested you contact him.

    and look... when you make it... they'll call you an overnight success...

    Ask them... do you know who Chiwetel Ejiofor is?


  • Sending you so much love and compassion! This is something I feel so strongly about. I hope you know Karina, this happens to almost every great artist - however I know this fact itself doesn’t effect the feeling of rejection.

    I think what separates the ones who make it from the ones who don’t are the ones who go through exactly where you are now and don’t give up.

    Hey I have someone who I’d like to introduce you to who I know will have 10x better advice than me.

    Send me a DM if you’d like 😌

You must sign up or log in before you 
add a comment.

Post reply