Commit a crime and cheat on your partner: two copywriting tasks from Read Me
This is my response to the first chapter in Gyles Lingwood and Roger Horberry's copywriting book Read Me. For the first task, we were asked to write a short article/rant/propaganda piece. With the goal of convincing people why they should commit an imprisonable offence in their lifetime. And later in task two, the case for cheating on your partner. Both tasks needed to be between 100 and 300 words. Here's what I came up with.
Why everyone should commit an imprisonable offence sometime in their life
Middle-aged, middle management, middling career...
You didn’t start out like this. You saw more to your life. More money, fun and excitement.
For what you do in life to have meaning.
But something happened along the way. You had to settle down, compromise, do things differently. Slowly, it killed your spark.
Put the bins out on time.
Be nice to your neighbour.
Save the receipts and carefully file your business expenses.
Now you’re a mid-level manager. Your grey suit wears you. Meandering from meeting to meeting with her from finance, or him from HR. You know the ones. They bring dull conversation, bad biscuits and even worse coffee.
You need a break.
Take control, and find your spark again. Put your next holiday on expenses. Make your boss pay for your new TV. Stick it to the people who trapped you in this business casual nightmare.
Escape the grey. Bring the colour and joy back to your world. Take what you deserve.
And if you get caught, at least you tried.
The case for cheating on your partner
There’s something you’ve been meaning to tell your partner...
Something that you’ve known for a long time, but never told anyone. Something that’s been a part of you for a long time. A secret burning desire, the fuel of teenage dreams, fidgeting and clammy hands when you talk about it.
Don’t worry. It’s perfectly normal. Lots of people do it and it’s nothing to be ashamed of.
You want them to put their blank in your blank…
Hey, no judgement here. You do you. As long as it’s between consenting adults and you know the risks, it’s cool.
You’ve plucked up the courage to tell them. But they’re just not into it…
Now what?
There’s plenty of people out there. Some of them are more than happy to put their blank in your blank.
You might even know some of them. That girl from your friend’s sister's wedding, that dude from accounts...
Take a chance, scratch your itch, and go back to your partner refreshed.