I wanted to look back on positive memories and relish in them, allowing myself to feel the pain of separation alongside the joy of what once was. Since I turned 19, I am now for the first time feeling nostalgic about childhood because I no longer remember it as if it was yesterday. I feel removed from my past self by time. I feel as though I’m “becoming a woman” and “growing up”. I have looked forward to these things my whole life, but I am so scared. I can’t help but yearn to play in the waves again.